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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25423519">Baba</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmpressCactuar/pseuds/EmpressCactuar'>EmpressCactuar</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bertholdt is transgender male in this fic, Gender Dysphoria, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Mpreg, Pregnancy, Requested fic, Trans Male Character, went pretty far out of my comfort zone here please be gentle with me</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 05:28:09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>4,954</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25423519</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/EmpressCactuar/pseuds/EmpressCactuar</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A little Bertl? What about a little Reiner? Truthfully, he couldn’t decide which one would be worse to have around. </p><p>(Requested fic, Reiner and Bertl have a baby)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Reiner Braun/Bertolt Hoover</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>65</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Baba</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>
  <i>mpreg?</i>
</p><p>I sort of thought this was in my SFW request box and not in the NSFW one when I wrote it, sorry...</p><p>I don't like mpreg as a concept but I'm not so against it that I refuse to write it. That being said, I would prefer to write a transgender male character than a cisgender male /somehow/ getting pregnant<br/>I tried to be very mindful of not being bad at presenting transgender issues or anything like that. I hope I did alright... for some reason this one makes me worry? I tried really hard ^^;</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    
<p></p><div>
  <p>
“What do you mean you’re pregnant?” Reiner sat down on the couch and ran both of his hands through his hair. It felt like the world was spinning, truth be told, but Bertholdt was standing there in front of him with an anxious expression on his face, teetering on heartbreak. Reiner’s eyes widened and he put his hands up. “I-I’m not mad at you, Bertl, I just…”
</p>
  <p>
“I-I’m sorry, Reiner, I’m sorry, I…” Reiner shook his head and stood, then pulled his husband into a tight hug. He ran his hand up and down Bertholdt’s back and rested his head on Bertholdt’s shoulder. A shaky breath came, followed by quakes of the lithe body Reiner clung to.
</p>
  <p>
“Stop apologizing, Bertholdt. Sssh. Calm down, love…” Reiner led Bertholdt to the couch and gently sat him down, then ran a hand along Bertholdt’s cheek. Bertholdt watched him for a moment and nodded his head, but Reiner saw the deep distress on every feature of his husband’s face. “How did this even happen? We’re always so careful... when was the last time we had sex bareback anyways?”
</p>
  <p>
“Uh, I thought about it…” Bertholdt fidgeted with his fingers and shook his head. “Remember that night when we went to the drive-in and the movie was really bad? And we went to the backseat and started making out?” 
</p>
  <p>
Reiner flushed and remembered the night. The movie had been <i>terrible.</i> Bertholdt had started kissing him, and then one thing led to another and soon enough Bertholdt was bouncing on his lap. They didn’t have a condom but Bertholdt had whispered ‘to hell with it’ and it had been so hot, he ran his hands down Bertholdt’s sides...
</p>
  <p>
“Yeah, I remember…” Reiner swallowed and shook his head. God, he was an idiot! So close to the last few steps in Bertholdt’s transition, too. After so much time of trying to get everything sorted out. They’d finally gotten his top surgery last year, complete with a tacky card with a treasure chest courtesy of Marcel. “What are we going to do?”
</p>
  <p>
“What do you mean, Reiner?” The words were quiet and mumbled. Reiner could tell Bertholdt wanted to cry, but was holding it in. Reiner gently ran his hands through Bertholdt’s hair and kissed his husband’s temple. Bertholdt breathed heavily and shook his head. “I’m sorry, I was the one who said it was okay without the condom.”
</p>
  <p>
“It takes two, Bertl… I wasn’t complaining at all at the time…” Reiner’s words were filled with anxiety despite his awkward chuckle, Bertholdt could tell. But still, Reiner was trying to be his rock. No wonder he’d loved Reiner for so long. As long as he could remember. The hands running up and down his back shook ever so slightly. “About all this, I, well, what you want to do? It’s your choice, I’ll support whatever you decide to do.”
</p>
  <p>
The meaning behind Reiner’s words became apparent to him. Did he want to keep it? Carry it to term, raise it with Reiner? Put it up for adoption? Terminate it? The reality of the situation made Bertholdt feel as though the room were spinning around him. As soon as the test was positive he ran to Reiner and now everything was sinking in.
</p>
  <p>
“Bertl? Bertholdt!” Reiner’s voice sounded panicked, but after a moment Bertholdt was looking at his husband and seeing worried eyes. “You fainted…” Reiner ran a hand through Bertholdt’s hair and held him close. Bertholdt shook his head, then grunted when he felt Reiner pick him up. They went to their bedroom, Reiner delicately placing Bertholdt on the bed. 
</p>
  <p>
“I don’t know. I need to process all of this, Reiner…” Bertholdt covered his face with his hands and shook his head. They wanted to adopt children. Two, actually. But adoption was so expensive. Having a child would cut that in half. But he was a man, and carrying a child might <i>seriously</i> mess with his body image. What did Reiner want? Reiner was saying it was up to him, but surely his husband had an opinion. 
</p>
  <p>
Bertholdt looked at his husband after he pulled his hands away from his face. Reiner looked shell-shocked, until he noticed Bertholdt staring at him. Then an awkward smile crossed his face. Reiner reached over and tenderly ran the back of his hand along Bertholdt’s face. “Bertholdt. I love you.”
</p>
  <p>
“I love you too.” Bertholdt sighed and moved to lean against the headboard, then closed his eyes. “I think… I want to keep it.” Bertholdt’s eyes were closed, but in spite of that he heard Reiner moving closer to him and then running a hand along his face. Bertholdt’s eyes fluttered open, him seeing vulnerable amber eyes staring back at him.
</p>
  <p>
“Are you sure, Bertl? You know you’ll have to stop taking your testosterone until after everything is over. And your hysterectomy, we’ll need to reschedule it for after you have it.” Reiner was staring at him intensely, and in that moment Bertholdt realized that they were at a major crossroads in their lives. And Reiner was waiting for him to say which way they were going to go. “I want you to know I’ll be fine with whatever you decide is best. I only want my husband to be happy.”
</p>
  <p>
“Oh, Reiner… I love you.” Bertholdt felt his eyes welling up. It really was a terribly stressful situation, and he felt he was going to break. If Reiner had gotten mad, surely Bertholdt <i>would’ve</i> broke. His lip trembled, and finally Bertholdt let himself start to cry. Reiner held him and ran his hand up and down Bertholdt’s back in an attempt to calm him down. “You won’t be mad at me if I want to keep it?”
</p>
  <p>
“No, Bertholdt. I’m not mad at you, not at all.” Reiner nuzzled into Bertholdt’s shoulder and squeezed him. “Truthfully… I’m almost a little bit excited thinking about a tiny little Bertl running around the house.” Bertholdt was still crying, but he couldn’t help but snort at Reiner’s words.
</p>
  <p>
A little Bertl? What about a little Reiner? Truthfully, he couldn’t decide which one would be worse to have around. 
</p>
  <p><br/>
</p>
  <p>
“When are you due, then?” Pieck stretched out her leg and went into her pose. She and Bertholdt were doing yoga together, both of them matching each other’s poses. He wasn’t far along at all, because he only just found out a few days ago himself. Pieck had seen the folic acid and vitamin D in his bathroom and put the pieces together easily. She went to medical school, after all. “Next year, for sure.”
</p>
  <p>
“Probably sometime in April, definitely a spring baby…” Bertholdt breathed in deeply and exhaled. Yoga always relaxed him and dear god he needed it, because he was wound up enough about the situation as it was. It wasn’t that he was hiding it from Pieck, just waiting until he was out of the miscarriage danger zone. They were going to tell their friends at twelve weeks. “Reiner has been feeling odd lately… he’s okay with the situation but he’s not sure how to process it.”
</p>
  <p>
“I understand. If Pock got pregnant I think he wouldn’t know what to do either.” Pieck came out of her pose and thought about her husband. Yes, he would handle it terribly. Worse than Bertholdt. Porco was never known for his level head and proportionate reactions to things. “Are you okay? Are you afraid?”
</p>
  <p>
“I don’t know. I haven’t thought too much about the scary things like labor and complications.... It doesn’t even really feel real. I’m going to my first appointment in a few weeks, but it feels so far away…” Bertholdt decided to stop and sit on his couch. “Reiner went out and got me my folic acid and vitamin D as soon as I said I wanted to keep it. I'll be okay, I have Reiner. You and your husband. Annie and Marcel. As long as it's healthy...”
</p>
  <p>
A tiny laugh from Pieck. “Everyone always says as long as it’s healthy. Yes, as long as the baby is healthy.” Pieck paused for a moment, then looked to her friend. “Remember to take care of yourself too, Bertl. You worry too much about Reiner and your friends and not enough about yourself.”
</p>
  <p>
“I’ll be fine. I always am, aren’t I?” Bertholdt heard Pieck’s hum and drank a sip from his glass of water. Bertholdt chewed his lower lip and thought about what his new reality was going to be. 
</p>
  <p>
All the googling he’s done keeps talking about mommies to be and it makes him want to curl up. Reiner had started asking who’s going to be daddy and who would be papa. Then Reiner had mentioned going back to his Turkish roots and letting the baby call Bertholdt baba instead.
</p>
  <p>
That sounded nice. Baba. Bertholdt was probably going to go with that.
</p>
  <p>
But that was just one little thing that made him smile in a mountain of things that made him feel <i>off.</i> Here’s how other women announce pregnancies, first steps towards <i>mother</i>hood, how to feel empowered as a woman while pregnant.
</p>
  <p>
He was never a woman. Fucking Reiner bareback and dealing with the consequence of that didn’t suddenly make him a woman, but part of him felt like a fucking outsider doing something he wasn’t supposed to be doing.
</p>
  <p>
So many trans men want to be seen as just regular guys. Would they hate him for getting pregnant? Bertholdt was nervous at the thought. Maybe he should talk to Porco about it? But he didn’t want to talk to too many people about his situation right now. Hell, Pieck wasn't even supposed to know but she was smart and saw the supplements.
</p>
  <p>
Bertholdt rested a hand on his flat belly and wondered when he was supposed to feel love.
</p>
  <p><br/>
</p>
  <p>
“I need a drink…” Bertholdt mumbled to himself, him leaning against the car window while Reiner gave him a pitiful look and rested a hand on his shoulder for a moment. The familiar scenery flew by while they drove to the doctor. He was about eight weeks now, and it was time for his first doctor’s appointment. 
</p>
  <p>
They’d thought they’d have gotten Bertholdt seen sooner but the doctor didn’t want him seen until then. Reiner had just assumed they’d be in the next week after they’d found out. In the end they had to print out a giant checklist that went month-to-month so they’d get everything taken care of.
</p>
  <p>
“I’m sorry, Bertl. I’ll get you a bottle of your favorite wine for when all of this is over.” Reiner leaned over and pecked a kiss to Berhtoldt’s cheek as soon as they were parked. Bertholdt smiled and leaned over so his head was resting on Reiner’s shoulder. Reiner hummed and leaned his head over to meet his husband’s.
</p>
  <p>
“You know what I really want?” Reiner pulled away and lifted his eyebrows in a gesture for Bertholdt to answer his own question. Bertholdt gave an adorable, shy smile and fidgeted with his fingers. “I was thinking, maybe we could go to the grocery store and you could get me some chili peppers?”
</p>
  <p>
Reiner laughed and kissed Bertholdt’s nose, then started unbuckling to get out of the car. “I can do that for you. I thought you might say more sauerkraut or eggs.” Bertholdt had been having cravings for sure, but it wasn’t like the jokes on TV where he’d want pickles inside of ice cream. Reiner was truthfully thankful for that, because he would heave if Bertholdt covered a pickle in chocolate sauce then ate it.
</p>
  <p>
“Thank you, Reiner…” Bertholdt fidgeted nervously when he went into the office of his doctor. There were other couples there, but they stuck out. Was everyone staring at him? Bertholdt felt nervous. Like he was just not supposed to be here. He rested his hands across his belly while he and Reiner waited for the doctor to call him back.
</p>
  <p>
Reiner wasn’t fazed by anything. He was reading the fatherhood magazine on the table, occasionally leaning over and whispering to Bertholdt about the features of this stroller versus that stroller. But sometimes Bertholdt felt eyes on them, or were they on <i>him?</i> Did anyone even care? He never cared about anyone else when he went to the doctor. Humans are selfish, care about themselves first and foremost. Why would they care about him right now?
</p>
  <p>
There were definitely some curious stares whenever he and Reiner both went to the back when Bertholdt’s name was called. They were politely greeted by the familiar doctor, then took their places while the doctor prepped him.
</p>
  <p>
“A lot of the time, pregnancy isn’t real for people until they actually see their little one on the ultrasound.” Bertholdt fidgeted and gave some sounds of affirmation that he was listening, but said nothing. “Okay, Mr. Braun. You’re going to feel some pressure, okay?” Bertholdt nodded but squeezed his eyes, then felt Reiner’s hand on his shoulder. 
</p>
  <p>
“Oh, look, Bertl.” Reiner squeezed Bertholdt’s shoulder when the doctor pointed out the blob on the screen that was supposed to be their little one. “It’s our baby. I wonder what they're going to be like?”
</p>
  <p>
“They'll be cute regardless. Their legs are already a bit long. Maybe they'll take after you, Bertholdt?” The doctor said, pointing out the little leg and arm buds. 
</p>
  <p>
“I'd rather have a little Reiner than a little me, I think...” Bertholdt said with a tired laugh, him feeling relief when the ultrasound was over. It was cold and he didn’t like it.
</p>
  <p>
After they left, Reiner leaned over to Bertholdt and gave him a kiss. “You want a little me? Really? I was thinking a tiny Bertl sounded perfect...” Bertholdt closed his eyes and nodded with a tiny smile, him amused by Reiner's teasing. Truthfully, he was only eight weeks in and he was already feeling the effects of living in a body different than the one he’d grown accustomed to.
</p>
  <p>
He’d already gone through a female puberty, which was hell. Then he pretty much went through another puberty when he transitioned, which was hell. And now all his hormones were getting fucked and that was hell too.
</p>
  <p>
“We can come up with some different names and think about what we want.” Bertholdt closed his eyes and let himself grin a dumb grin. “I’ll be happy regardless. For some reason, I feel like the baby is going to have a head full of pretty blonde hair.” Pregnancy was definitely hell, and he wasn’t enjoying it, but the end result was all that mattered to him.
</p>
  <p><br/>
</p>
  <p>
When he started showing was when it started getting <i>weird.</i> The first couple of months, he was pregnant but nobody knew because it was easy to hide. He pretty much looked the same as usual, but now it was noticeable; he and Reiner were definitely getting looks when they went out in public now. Many of which were hateful. And he got bizarre and offensive questions every now and then. At one time there was an implication that Reiner was actually straight, which may have been funny if it hadn't been so offensive and stupid.
</p>
  <p>
But it wasn’t going to stop him from going out, because as much as Bertholdt wanted to stay wrapped up in a blanket at home he still needed to work and he still needed to go shopping. Reiner was pushing the cart while Bertholdt rummaged through the items in the store. He wanted to buy up all the stuffed animals, and there were so many toys...
</p>
  <p>
“What sort of theme should the nursery have?” Bertholdt asked Reiner while they wandered. If they went with an ocean theme they wouldn't want to buy toy dragons and unicorns... Reiner was comparing the cans of formula and humming to himself. Bertholdt had a passing thought about how cute Reiner’s reading glasses were while he was reading the cans. 
</p>
  <p>
“How about space? Or safari?” Reiner suggested. “I saw a really cute mobile with little stuffed animals, like a little lion and elephant and giraffe… but I saw another with little moons and stars.” Reiner put one of the cans into the cart, but Bertholdt plucked it out and started reading it for himself.
</p>
  <p>
“I like safari more. We could get a brown-colored crib, and get lots of animals for the room…” There was a woman down the aisle staring at him. Bertholdt trailed off and started to want to go home. He was never one to be stared at. In high school he tried to blend in as best he could. Easy next to Reiner. Hard when Reiner was standing still reading mindlessly. “Reiner. Can we go home soon?”
</p>
  <p>
“Yeah, we can, I just want to decide which formula we should get because I want to start buying some. Its expiration isn't for over a year, so it'll be fine...” Reiner wasn’t dismissive. But he wasn’t noticing the stares; he was bad about getting tunnel vision at times. “How about this one?”
</p>
  <p>
They checked out and went to the car, but Bertholdt felt worn out and rested his hands on his belly. He was definitely feeling love towards the baby, but it was making his life hard and he wanted all of this to be over. Reiner delicately kissed his temple and Bertholdt knew it would all be fine.
</p>
  <p><br/>
</p>
  <p>
Reiner wanted sex. That much was obvious when he kissed Bertholdt’s neck, then nibbled his earlobe. Reiner always did that when he wanted to have sex.
</p>
  <p>
The end of the first trimester had been interesting. Apparently the increased blood flow helped with sensitivity and arousal, and Bertholdt had worn Reiner out and then some with how much he'd wanted to have sex. Not that Reiner minded at all; he was perfectly content with the situation. Especially since they didn’t have to use condoms anymore, it had seemed.
</p>
  <p>
But now he was showing; he was about 25 weeks through, and as thin as he’d been before his belly was starting to swell. And Bertholdt hated it. Pregnancy was a woman’s thing, at least according to society. He was acutely aware of the fact, especially when he went out.
</p>
  <p>
Reiner licked Bertholdt’s neck and growled into his ear. Bertholdt shivered and felt goosebumps on his skin. But then Reiner’s hands made their way to his belly, and Bertholdt started to pull away. Reiner’s brows rose and he looked confused. “Bertl?”
</p>
  <p>
“Sorry, Reiner…” Bertholdt brought his hands to his face and shook his head. Reiner frowned and grabbed Bertholdt’s hands, then ran his thumbs along the backs of Bertholdt’s hands. Reiner kissed Bertholdt’s cheek and waited for Bertholdt to speak. “I just… feel bad…”
</p>
  <p>
“About what, love? You were fine just a minute ago?” Reiner pulled away and Bertholdt knew he was worried. Bertholdt rested his hands on his stomach and shook his head. He felt tears prickling at his eyes, then he sniffled. “Oh, Bertholdt, what are those tears for…?”
</p>
  <p>
“I’m tired of this, Reiner. I hate it.” Bertholdt let out a tiny sob at that. “I want the baby out. I love them but I hate what they’ve done to me. I want my body back. I was going to get that last surgery soon. We were going to the gym together, and my abs looked so good. I've worked so hard. I haven't had to wear a binder in over two years. I've been becoming the man I’ve always felt like and now I have people treating me like a woman because of the baby.”
</p>
  <p>
“Oh, Bertholdt. I’m sorry…” Reiner nuzzled into Bertholdt and ran a hand up and down his husband’s back. He gestured for Bertholdt to turn around, then started massaging the tense shoulders. “I can’t imagine how hard it is for you. You’re growing our baby and your body is under stress. But I want you to know I love you. It’s okay. If you don’t want to go out, that’s okay. You’re supposed to be on bedrest, anyways. I’ll take care of you.”
</p>
  <p>
“I feel like you’re going to be disgusted with my body.” Bertholdt cried, then covered his face. “You’re already a gay man and I don’t have a penis… and now I’ve got this going on, I must look disgusting to you.” Reiner closed his eyes and put his forehead on Bertholdt’s back. 
</p>
  <p>
“Bertholdt. Do you remember when we lost our virginity?” Bertholdt flushed at the question and thought back to it. He hadn’t transitioned yet. Everyone still called him by his deadname except for his closest friends. 
</p>
  <p>
“It was prom night, after it was over you took me out in your mom’s car and we got into the backseat.” Bertholdt flushed at the memory. Truthfully, for their first time the sex hadn’t been that bad. The worst part had been the heat and limited space in the car. "It was cramped and my legs got tired..."
</p>
  <p>
“Yeah. But I loved you before you were on T, when you still needed your binders, before you were growing that cute beard you insist on shaving off every morning even though I want to see you grow it out.” Reiner chuckled and kissed his back. “You’ve always been a perfect boyfriend. You’re a perfect husband now.”
</p>
  <p>
The mood had been killed; neither of them wanted sex anymore. But Bertholdt decided to lay in bed, Reiner scooting in next to him. Reiner’s words were comforting. The kisses on his face were too, as was the hand roaming around on his belly. 
</p>
  <p>
He was more than halfway done. Soon enough, it would all be over.
</p>
  <p><br/>
</p>
  <p>
Only about a month left. Bertholdt spent most of his time in bed now, or in the rocking chair in the nursery. Or on the couch watching reality TV shows. He missed exercising the way he used to, but it’d probably be a long time until he could work out with Reiner again. Hell, it'd be a while before either of them worked out much. Babies took up lots of time, after all.
</p>
  <p>
“Stop with all the kicking, little one…” Bertholdt complained to himself. He was done with all of this. Done being pregnant, done not taking his T, done needing to pee every fifteen minutes, done having this weight on his front, done not being able to have sex the ways he wanted to, done having everyone stare at him. “You’re doing it too hard; you should know by now that hurts baba…”
</p>
  <p>
He was beyond over pregnancy. He’d heard that lots of women say it’s fantastic, beautiful, they loved it, wanted to do it again. Bertholdt just wanted it to be over and never deal with it again; pregnancy was horrendous and disgusting and awful. Pieck appreciated his honesty, but Karina had taken offense when he complained about his current state.
</p>
  <p>
Reiner had made up the nursery into a safari theme. Bertholdt appreciated the stuffed rhino and giraffe by the crib, but he liked the lions and grasslands painted on the walls too. It was an adorable room and it all felt so much more real. They had pretty much everything they’d need. 
</p>
  <p>
Annie and Porco would up having an affinity for tiny little outfits. They loaded them down, especially Porco with animal onesies. 
</p>
  <p>
“I wonder if you’ll look like me or daddy? I’m ready for things to go back to normal.” There was poking inside of him at that. Supposedly it recognized the sound of his voice. Reiner always liked talking to his belly at night and Bertholdt wondered if the baby recognized his voice too. Reiner would greet Bertholdt, then his “little buddy” whenever he came home from work. Knowing his husband, Reiner would be calling the child his buddy up into adulthood.
</p>
  <p>
It was nice having a nurse as a husband, because Reiner always seemed to know exactly what he needed. Bertholdt was fine not going back to work. He was going to be busy raising baby, and since Porco wasn’t working there would be some help during the daytime while Reiner and Pieck were at work.
</p>
  <p>
“My darling. I love you.”
</p>
  <p><br/>
</p>
  <p>
Dear god, labor was miserable. He knew it would be, Karina had told him all about it and everything he’d heard was about how it was horrendous. He was sweating and crying, but Reiner was in his scrubs next to him telling him how proud he was and he was doing just fine. Reiner kissed the top of his head while Bertholdt squeezed his hand and sobbed. 
</p>
  <p>
“It’s okay, dear, you’re doing good… you’re perfect.” 
</p>
  <p>
It was scary, it hurt, and he felt utterly exposed in front of all these people. But then the doctors started swarming, and Reiner started to look worried while Bertholdt looked around. There were a lot of words getting tossed around, like “prolapse” and “emergency” and “oxygen supply.” 
</p>
  <p>
“What’s going on?” Bertholdt choked out. His face was wet from the sweat and tears, and now Reiner looked like he was starting to worry. It hurt so terribly, but it would be over soon. It had to be. “Reiner, I’m scared…”
</p>
  <p>
“They need to do an emergency c-section, it’s going to be okay. I promise.” Bertholdt was already on the cusp of panicking, and asked why. Umbilical prolapse, apparently. But before he knew it, he was getting put under by the anesthesiologist. Reiner kept telling him it was okay, it was all okay, it was all going to be okay.
</p>
  <p>
Bertholdt’s eyes squeaked open and he found himself in an unfamiliar room. He glanced around and saw Reiner gently rocking a bundle in his arms. He made a groaning sound, Reiner glancing up at the noise. As soon as Reiner heard him he smiled and got up, crossing the room.
</p>
  <p>
“Hey, love. You’re awake. Well… actually awake. You were really out of it whenever you came back from the anesthesia. You wanted to name the baby Lasagna. You got upset with me when I said that wasn't going to happen.” Bertholdt stuck out his arms and accepted the bundle whenever Reiner handed it over. A tiny set of eyes met his own, and Bertholdt smiled. “Our daughter. She's been wanting to meet you.”
</p>
  <p>
“Wow… we have a baby, Reiner. We made a whole new life. A new person. This little person came from us…” Bertholdt brought her up and kissed the top of her head, then nuzzled her. The baby made tiny little sounds, but eased up at the sound of Bertholdt’s voice. She remembered his voice, and it touched Bertholdt’s heart. “You went with the name we agreed on?”
</p>
  <p>
Reiner gave him a tired smile and nodded while he sat back down on the chair he had been in. He slouched and rested his hands on his chest. “Of course I did. Gabrielle Aria. Gabi.” Bertholdt nodded and ran a finger along her cheek, then on top of her head.
</p>
  <p>
“She’s got my black hair. And your nose.” Bertholdt observed the very fine, sparse hair on her head. He couldn’t help but just hold her close and wish he could give her every single thing she ever wanted. “Have you ever seen someone so perfect? So special?”
</p>
  <p>
“I’m looking at the most perfect man in the world and the most perfect baby in the world.” Reiner moved the chair to be directly next to Bertholdt’s bed. They’d be giving him more pain medicine soon. But in the meantime, Reiner took back the swaddled baby and cooed at her with his husband.
</p>
  <p>
Bertholdt felt his heart fluttering inside of him. There would never, ever be a day he’d want his precious angel out of his sight.
</p>
  <p><br/>
</p>
  <p>
“Come on, Udo… daddy and baba are sleeping so we can scare them!” Gabi had become quite the little troublemaker in her seven years. Even worse after her parents adopted her little brother. Udo followed behind nervously, him fidgeting with his fingers in the meantime.
</p>
  <p>
“I-I dunno, Gabi… this seems like a really bad idea. We should leave daddy and baba alone…” Gabi rolled her eyes at her brother and very carefully opened the door to the master bedroom as quietly as she could. Her daddy and baba were sleeping next to one another, but for some reason their baba was facing the other way and his foot was next to their daddy’s face. “Gabi…”
</p>
  <p>
“Sssh… Don’t worry, it’ll be funny…” Gabi very quietly tip-toed to the end of the bed, then placed the large rubber spider that she got from a friend at school next to her baba’s face. Once she was sure he would see it when he woke up, she tapped the end of the bed by his head. Baba wasn’t awake, so she tapped again.
</p>
  <p>
“Hng…?” Baba made a confused sound, then his eyes slid open. As soon as he saw the rubber spider in front of him, he let out a piercing screech and panicked. And in doing so, he kicked Reiner in the face and knocked him out of bed. Which wouldn’t be so bad, if Reiner hadn’t hit his head on the nightstand on the way down. 
</p>
  <p>
Bertholdt hopped out of bed and stood quickly, his heart racing in his chest while his son and daughter started crying. He immediately crossed the room and found Reiner with blood all over his face from being kicked in the nose, and a large knot on his head. Reiner was obviously confused and disoriented, but Bertholdt helped him up and led him to the bathroom to clean up the blood.
</p>
  <p>
The sound of kid’s sobbing from the bedroom came into the bathroom, and Bertholdt shook his head while he helped Reiner and tried to calm down.
</p>
  <p>
Parenthood was the hardest thing he’d ever done.
</p>
</div>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Very brief implied trans Porco for the soul. I wrote this late and it was hard but I wanted a scene with him and just didn't. Also I feel like the ending implies Udo is their bio son, he is not. The intent was that Bert went on to get the hysterectomy and Udo is adopted</p><p>I hope this request was okay, again it's a very foreign thing to me and I tried. ^^; Mpreg is hard for me, and I watched some videos of real transgender dads trying to help with my writing. I hope this is decent/okay...</p></blockquote></div></div>
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